John’s experience: Never bring your wife…

I’m a 32-year-old male, who after being married for 10 years and producing 3 beautiful children felt it was only right that I assume the responsibility of bringing a permanent solution to birth control.

I began by talking to, of all people, my wife’s ob-gyn. On one of her routine pregnancy check-ups, I asked what he knew about vasectomies, who performed them, whether they were a simple operation. He advised me to wait until our child was born and that we were sure the child was healthy. At that time I should go to a family doctor and get a referral to a urologist.

I followed his advice and several months after the birth of our third child I went found a doctor and discussed my situation. He informed me that some general practitioners performed vasectomies as well, and referred me to his in-office partner. I was angered to find that for just a consultation I would have to wait 6 weeks! To make matters worse I missed my appointment by one day (why don’t doctor’s offices call to remind you of appointments anymore?) and they insisted that I wait another 4 weeks. At this point I went back to my wife’s ob-gyn and asked for a referral to a urologist he knew and trusted to perform the procedure. 2 weeks later I went in for my consultation.

At the consultation, the urologist gave me a booklet, told me to read it, then went about telling me that everything in the book was not what he was going to do. Instead of the 2 incision method, my doctor performed a single incision in the middle of my scrotum, pulled out each vas, and cut/cauterized them. A consultation should basically be called a “covering our butts warning session” since all the doctor really did was go over one at a time the things that could go wrong so I couldn’t hold him liable.

I made my appointment for… drum roll… Friday the 13th! I thought it was kinda funny myself. I brought my wife with me so she could drive me home, wore snug-fitting underwear, and shaved myself (just in case I’d rather not have a stranger near me with a razor blade).

At the office, I told my wife to come to watch the procedure. I figured I had watched her give birth to three children by cesarian and seen her uterus in a doctor’s hands so this was the least she could do. This was to be my big mistake.

The vasectomy

The operation was going along routinely. I did feel this very intense pulling sensation on my left side that went all the way up to my stomach at one point. The doctor assured me everything was fine and that was routine. I turned to my wife for support and asked her how she was doing. She talked about how the vas was way bigger than she imagined and so was the incision. Then she looked at me and said I think I’m going to faint… I laughed, not the laugh of “your joking”, but the laugh of “I knew something would happen”. My wife suffers from a low tolerant vaso-vegal response system. The vaso-vegal system is your inborn reflex towards pain and trauma and can be triggered just by sight in some people. In the past, my wife has only had extreme reactions during pregnancy. During pregnancy, she has passed out in a nail salon and in a Nordstrom’s, as well as in the hospital when they were preparing her for her second c-section.

I had thought nothing of this because my wife wasn’t pregnant, and didn’t have a reaction at all during her third pregnancy besides she was just sitting there. But, the minute she said that I looked at the doctor and said, her eyes are going to roll back in her head and she’s going to pass out for about 30 seconds, then she’ll be fine. He was mid-procedure and not thrilled to hear my nonchalant explanation of what was about to happen. And just like that my wife was on the floor, the doctor had to leave me on the table while he called in a nurse and attended my wife. When she awoke and was back to normal he asked her to leave in that annoyed tone, I myself just laughed.

The rest of the procedure went fine and an hour after he started I was done and trying to walk out to my car with an ice pack between my legs. I went straight to bed and stayed there for the better part of 48 hours. I myself didn’t use an ice pack a lot, because it seemed to be causing more pain than it was worth.

The recovery

That Wednesday I was already feeling well enough to attempt to get my wife to see if I still functioned 🙂 It was a no go and she told me to wait at least a week. So I tried out myself. That first post-procedure ejaculation was followed by a warm almost nauseating sensation. I was very glad that I didn’t wait until my wife and I had sex. The next day I noticed that I was much sorer and upon examining myself found that my left testicle seemed to be swollen and had a lump. I thought nothing of it until after 3 more days it seemed worse. I was sensitive to the touch, and the slightest jostle would send that “I’ve been elbowed in the crotch” feeling through my body for a few moments. At that point, I sought out this site and posted a message to the forums. Of course, the next day the pain was significantly decreased, and by today (12 days post-procedure) I feel absolutely back to normal with no swelling or side effects of any kind, what a relief! Now I just have to get my wife to help me reach my twentieth ejaculation so I can send my sample in and see if our goal was achieved.

Submitted by John